For someone who had been born on an island in the middle of a lake, Delmont Prieur had never very much liked the water. Boats, he liked even less. So when the small skiff that had borne him across the great Divinity Reservoir made landfall on the very same island that had been his childhood home, Delmont was only too glad to disembark. Sparing a brief word of thanks for the ferryman, he proceeded quickly up the pier then mounted the stone steps that lead from the quay. Ahead of him, just visible between the arching oaks, his family’s manor home loomed.
The household staff of the Prieur family had quite a task ahead of them. Normally, at the end of the Wintersday festival they would be allowed a few days rest before having to put the house back to rights, by virtue of the limited influence their lady had over their lord. Usually, it would be a time for them to finish their own seasonal celebrations, having put them off to see to the annual Wintersday Ball. This year, however, was an exception to the general rule. Though they knew their lady would have preferred to grant them their leave, they also knew that proper procedure had tied her hands. They could not rest quite yet this year as they first needed to prepare the house for the family’s honored guest.
[IC - Zaifar] Journal - “Present Day”
What a way to start the season of Zephyr! Hello 1326 AE!
There’s so much to be doing this year. I came back home late today from Mr. Noah’s appointment, very exhausted from our mission at Loreclaw and trying to ease Mr. Noah’s mind. Father just gave me a earful for coming home late the last few days, I told him it was work! Wish he didn’t hold so much resentment against my work.
He’ll come to accept it amiably some day. He will!
Lord Prieur’s right. I am not physically apt nor thoroughly honed in the arts. Loreclaw’s adventure was a huge trouble for me and Margolo was so brave enough to guide me through the booby-trapped carvern and walked me through the planks. I am surprisingly impressed by her boldness. I hardly jumped and just used my skills in portal sorcery to port from place to place.
It felt like I was holding everyone back. This must change. I am too used to desk work, it’s about time I get my buttocks up from office chairs and train myself!
I am very relieved to see Margolo’s having a good time with the Bureau. I have to put her on another evaluation to assess her mental state.
The Order of Whispers sent an order this season for everyone to get their mental well-being evaluated. Farothien was the first to be evaluated - He’s a charming lad, really. Has charisma of the golden sun. I got a little concerned by his perspective on love and choosing such a promiscuous lifestyle. I guess sylvari think a little differently when it comes to free-loving. Or it is just simply who he is. Deeply rooted (Hehehe, rooted!) into his unconsciousness is a free-spirited ego constructing his own ideals.
He spoke of a friend who made a faux threat against his lover in order to make his lover prove his love for him. That’s so risky and very worrying! I wonder who is it though. Islvyn? Lenalt?
Ms. Howe’s choices on her evaluation seem to hint some concerns. I will have to reassess and write her report soon. I do agree with her that the Bureau will need better communication among the agents when it comes to planning and strategizing for missions. She seemed to prefer all action and less talk. Her concerns are very valid and justified though, particularly directed to Lord Prieur.
I will have to talk to Lord Prieur about this sometime. And! Get him into a session scheduled too!
Poor girl though. At least she has recently gotten into a romantic relationship, maybe she’ll view the world a little differently with her man.
My third appointment was with Mr. Noah. Lord Prieur was present and explained the complications with his mind. I’d categorize Mr. Noah as ‘one of those difficult patients’ (May need additional sessions, maybe?). He’s got a bleak sense of humor too, judging from his brief evaluations. I got more insight after using hypnosis to clear the chaos in his mind. There will be plenty to write in his report.
Learning about my patients more and more makes me appreciate my own life better. I am a very fortunate man. I am blessed with a good father, wonderful friends, my career is stable and very promising. And I always bathing in knowledge and looking towards a bright tomorrow.
Margolo’s and Lenalt’s appointments are next week. Let’s see how they do.
To My Esteemed Colleagues,
By the Order’s recommendation, I have been tasked to conduct a psychological evaluation on each and every of the Bureau’s agents. It is to ensure all our agents’ mental and emotional health are maintained and well cared for, as well as mentally preparing our agents for future risky endeavors and missions.
Rest assured you are entitled to patient confidentiality. I am aware some of you require therapy to ease the burdens on your mind.
All agents - Please send me a message for scheduling and come to my office for your sessions, at your earliest convenience.
OOC Notes: So uh - IT’S ABOUT TIME I START THIS 8D I know some of you expressed interest. Basically, I’m gonna try to do one or two IC psych session each week with each and every one of you. It will only last 1-2hrs each session, comprising of a psych evaluation first half and a therapy consultation (for those who really need Zaifar to be a listening ear) for the second half.
Comment here or message me/Zaifar in-game if you want to set up a time to RP this. 8D
My available times to RP psych sessions: Friday, Saturday 6pm EST-10pm EST, 2am - 4am EST. (10pm - 12am if we have no guild RP nights scheduled) Just let me know which time slot is good for you.
Kayley - (Time?)
Tahlia - Friday 11/01 7pm - 9pm EST
Parth - (Time?)
Margolo - (Time?)
Lenalt - (Time?)
Noah/Delmont - Saturday 12/01 2am - 4am EST
Prowl - 2am - 4am sometime.
(If your name isn’t listed here, please express your interest ICly to Zaifar, via mail or RP all works!)
[IC-Zaifar] Psychology Report: “Year 1321: The Small Man”
It was his first experience ever taking on a patient. The silver-haired teen was nervous about his first day on the job. Even after a few years of intensive study and training in psychology, Zaifar was still uncertain about his ability to understand and mend the mind. On the contrary, his master, Lord Veilshade, was ascertain of his pupil’s competence.
"I don’t feel very ready to take on this assignment, Master," Zaifar let out a burdened sigh. "It feels like I haven’t grasped enough yet."
The elderly mesmer simply snorted. “Nonsense. Have a little faith in yourself. And haven’t I told you not to refer it as ‘assignment’? It’s -helping-, Amarantha. It’s called -helping- someone. Think of it as a charity cause you’re doing.”
"All right," Zaifar nodded and took a deep breath.
The elderly mesmer led the boy-psychiatrist to the sanitarium, situated in the outskirts of Divinity’s Reach. It was often not spoken of; The reputation of the sanitarium was unpopular but not sordid, it had prestige praises among nobles. Over the green fields, the asylum had a facade of open space and the pristine. Sunlight reflected off its white walls and pillars, bright flowers and soft green trees decorated along its walkways to give a calming effect and the marble statue of Lyssa resting on the fountain’s pedestal was a fresh, welcoming view upon the eyes.
Zaifar took his time to admire the craftsmanship of the statue as he walked by; Two angelic goddesses of smooth, white marble bodies, leaning against each other and held two halves of a smiling mask upon their bosoms. One would question the motive to place the goddess(es) of duality to guard the sanitarium — There was a peculiar oddness to it.
When the two entered the establishment, Zaifar was welcomed by a pleasant, pristine white view of the asylum. More white, more airy space, more archaic decorations — It was as though the interior was carefully and intently designed for a particular purpose. It could almost rival the Queen’s palace.
"Now, Amarantha," Lord Veilshade began, as he lead the younger mesmer to a mahogany door with a gold sign that said: ‘Therapy Room’. "I want you to -help- Viscount Maychild. Chat with him, ease his troubles. Do not be confrontational."
"He’s a viscount," said Zaifar, quite nervously.
"Yes, he’s a viscount," the elder mesmer sighed and rolled his eyes. "But do not be daunted by his status. You read his profile, right?"
Zaifar nodded, though there was hesitance as he lowered his gaze and pushed up his spectacles. “Yes, though he is undiagnosed. According to his profile, he showed symptoms of insomnia, loss of appetite, frequent bouts of panic attacks and was often seen lonesome and forlorn. I can make a guess he’s uhm— Suffering from depression?”
"I want you to not bring any writing materials into the room," said the Lord. "No notes. You can get analytical and study his condition all you want outside the therapy room but no, inside the room — Just listen, pay attention. Ask gently to let the Viscount open up slowly to you. Do not push - Allow time and coax."
Zaifar blinked and gave a questioning look to his master. “No notes? I can’t write down anything? How am I suppose to take note of what he tells me and understand him if I don’t get to write?”
"I said -no notes-!" Lord Veilshade snapped back, causing the young mesmer to wilt for a moment. "The point of simply listening and not writing down is not to make the patient feel like a scrutinized specimen! If you pay attention good and give it all to listen, you’ll remember what the patient has confided in you well."
"Y-Yes, master," Zaifar swallowed and nodded quickly.
Lord Veilshade turned back to the door and gently encouraged Zaifar to enter. “You’ll do just fine, Amarantha. Remember - Give it all to listen and help.”
VEILTRUE SANITARIUM, FACILITY OF MENTAL HEALTH
PATIENT NAME: Josiah Maychild
BIRTHDATE: 5th Day, Season of the Phoenix. 1301 AE.
The patient is a young Krytan man, age 20, of frail stature but of good health and no physical abnormalities in his medical history. He was recommended by his mother, Lady Maychild, to come to our asylum for treatment after noticing ‘undesirable actions’ in his own behaviour. Patient’s parents reported the viscount has not been able to sleep well for a long time with occasional bouts of anxiety attacks and panicking at nothing for no reason.
Worthy to note - Subject’s mother remarried to Count Maychild and has two half-siblings from his mother’s remarriage, his late father was a baron who died from a disease. No friends to be reported.
Patient was very quiet, spoke very little words. There is a certain downtrodden tone to his voice. Often speaking with hesitation, hardly smiled. His hair was not very groomed, weary eyes, crooked nails despite wearing a fine noble attire.
Subject has confided in me that he experienced a heavy feeling within him and impled that he felt his family would be very happy if he could disappear. I assured him that he has his place and value in the family.
We talked about the subject of gods later in our conversation. He seemed to revere Balthazar very much and thought of him as a role model and a being to aspire to be.
Will continue to observe him further in our next few sessions. Also sent a request to visit his manor.
The boy, or perhaps better named here the young Viscount Prieur, was seated on his father right at the dining room’s high table. This was a distinction shared by very few others. Of course the viscount’s mother was there, at his father’s left; to her left sat her lord father and lady mother, the Ministers Ruffec. To the viscount’s own right sat his father’s other great political ally, Minister Graveson, along with his wife and young daughter. All of his father’s other Wintersday guests sat at lower tables facing their own. As such, the viscount’s father expected nothing less than perfection from him. He was his father’s heir, after all, and must at all times show proper decorum.
I can’t sleep. My mind is clouded with nightmares despite the one person who never hurt me being right outside my room, and lovely Sola laying right beside me.
It’s like being trapped with ticking bombs. Who knows when they will join the others?
My insides are twisting and turning, and I feel like I’m going to puke.
I want to get drunk, but I can’t. I have to be a responsible adult. I have.. animals to take care of, a position to maintain, work to do.
But it’s okay to be scared. It’s not like this is the first time I have been abandoned.
It started with mother.. before I could even walk. Ha. If there is such thing as fate, this is probably mine. All the threads I’ve tried so hard to create between me and others.. They were never meant to be, so they simply started to snap. One. By. One.
I used to blame myself. It must have been my fault, since everybody else seemed to have such an easy time being.. together? Having relationships?
But what if that’s not the case? What if people are just.. heartless?
No. Some of them might have been, but Parth would never.. and I am sure Noah has a good reason, I am just too slow and stupid to see it yet.
Or maybe that was just my mind playing tricks on me? Maybe I so desperately wanted to be his friend that I just opened up without a second thought.
No. No no no. He’s better than that. Right? He has to be. Why can’t he just be straight with me?
I hate liars. I hate people who deceive others. I hate it when people hide in their stupid holes. I hate cowards. I hate weaklings. I hate masks.
So why don’t I hate him?
Or maybe it is all my fault. It’s starting to become more and more apparent how much I am torturing Parth. How much I am selfishly torturing myself. I want to tell him everything, but I can’t.
I’m not even sure why I can’t any more. Something about his family, but.. if he cared enough for both, surely we could make it work? We.. could fight. We do fight well together.
It’s like a beautiful dance. Completely in sync.
But it has always been.. literal fights, or fighting on the behalf of someone else.
Have we ever.. fought for us? Ha. No, that’s just too selfish. He would probably have a heart attack.
I am not worth the trouble either way. Most of my fri.. old friends.. made it a point to rub that in my face.
I am starting to understand mother after reading fathers journal. I still have no clue who translated it for me and left it at my door, and I am not sure I ever want to share it with everyone.
I would like to talk to her. Maybe she can help me.
[Emmett’s notebook, it is filled with messily written notes about the people of the bureau. It appears to be brainstorming for actual reports. There are several scribbles across this page, of bunnies, flowers and something that looks eerily like a griffon. He does not appear to have much talent in this branch of the arts.]
Entry 3 - The Fort and babysitting
- I built myself a fort of books. Delmont does not seem to mind. Odd. I like it there. I feel safe. Especially when his employees come bursting into the house, screaming as if they own the place.
- This time it was a lady. Howe, was it? She was very loud, and sounded very upset. Part of me wanted to help, part of me feared that she, like Kayley, would rid me of my privates if I got too close. I figured Delmont would handle it.
- But.. He sounded just as upset, if not more so than her at the time.
I am quite sure I saw a dent in the table when I looked later.He has a temper.
- I believe Silvershire was there too, but he did not say much. Something about.. Orr?
- I hope they find the guy that ran away. Kenneth, was it?
- Curiosity got the better of me and I headed downstairs. I saw a sylvari male. The same one that brought the kid home, Sarah, was it? Apparently he started a fight with the loud Lady Howe from before. Laid a hand on her no less! I.. felt furious.
I can handle the fire, but the ice..
- I think he deserved more punishment than what he got. But forgiveness.. is important. I am amazed that she was mature enough to let it go.
I hope that she, like me, doesn’t do that kind of thing out of fear. He should have been fired, or have become an unpaid employee, something!
- Nevertheless. Both she and Delmont forgave him, to an extend, gave him a second chance, so I treated him with respect the next time I saw him. I may have blown my chance to become a Priest, but I still want to follow their teachings.
- Much to my surprise, he asked me to babysit the little girl.
- I learnt that she consider.. Farothien, a prince, of some sort? I believe that was the name of the brown sylvari. He seemed pretty nice. If he checks up on her, I am sure I should not worry for her as she even if she stays with Lenalt.
- I am however, worried for her education. I absolutely hated mine, but.. I am also thankful.
- She said she wanted to become and adventurer. So basic knowledge about survival will be very important. Medicine could be useful, so could map reading, language and culture.
Fighting should be left to a man.
I also believe she needs to know about human history, she is, after all, human. And then obviously there are the Gods too.
- We built a big fort in the study. She is very hard working and considerate. Insisted on making it larger just so my legs would fit. It was hard work cleaning it all up, but worth it nonetheless.
Entry 4 -
- I met a man that questioned my celibacy. He raised a few good points, and I often didn’t know what to reply.. is it so wrong to do something because you want to do it? Because you feel it’s right for you? Maybe it is. I have yet to meet anybody that actually agreed with my view outside of my brief time at the temples. Still.. they seemed to do it for different reasons that me, or they had a free life before then and only just now choose this path.
I was so embarrassed.
Why would anyone assume I don’t know where to put it?
Surely the books were right?
I almost told Delmont about it. Odd how I’d rather tell a stranger these things than my own father. I don’t think I should push his kindness, drugged or not.
Especially not now.
- The man both he and Lady Howe appeared upset about came back, only to tell Delmont to stop looking. Why would he not look? I do not understand this.. appeal in men, and even less so after seeing the two of them talk
(They appear to be bigger drama queens than any woman I’ve ever met.. not that that counts for anything. I can’t even say hello without stuttering.), but I understand caring for someone.
- I think me living with Delmont made it worse.
Why..? I’m just a kid. People loved to tell me that repeatedly and now I am suddenly treated like some sort of adult presence?
- I hope distance will help this.. Kenneth person. As much as it pains me being unable to help the man that took me in with no questions asked, I understand this.. need to run away. People are very terrifying.
- Though she was not very terrifying. The Redheaded Priestess of Balthazar.
- She is going to the company ball with Silvershire. I think I will go to make sure that he treats her nicely. How does he have all these women running after him? Is he insanely handsome for a man? Surely it can’t be his personality.
- Maybe it’s like that Priest of Lyssa said. Maybe he is.. good at that. No! She’s a Priestess! She wouldn’t..!
[Emmett’s notebook, it is filled with messily written notes about the people of the bureau. It appears to be brainstorming for actual reports.]
Entry 1 - The Mission
- The short man(with the bow) is very
frighteningprotective of the firms secrets, even more so than Delmont would appear.
The pretty brunetteDo not get on Kayleys bad side, she will cut your privates off.
did not try to kill meseems kind.
- Kenneth did not treat Trace nicely. Kept poking her. My hair is still static. He’s a close friend of Delmonts.
- The lady Norn uses the same kind of magic as me. Perhaps I will learn more if she ever agrees to train me? She said that Delmont is like a bunny. Definitely does not look like one though. Appears that he is, he offered me his couch and a job. I don’t have to go home. I wonder if he will get angry if he ever finds out I will be watching him closely too. I need to learn in one way or the other, right?
- The girl we rescued, Sarah, is going to live with a Sylvari. Do they even know how to raise kids? Who is going to teach her about the Six Gods?
- The only other woman I saw was the quiet one. I wonder what she’s like. I think there are way too many men around.
Entry 2 - The Ball
- Silvershire is a horrible date. He does not know how to treat a woman right. Explains Kayleys terrifying mood most the time. They appear to be a couple..?
- Silvershire has a squire. Rowan. I still don’t believe we are the same age, he acts like a child, and he is so eager to fight.. I wonder if that’s simply how he is, or if it’s Silvershires influence doing it. He seemed so nice, though.
- Delmont seemed just as uncomfortable there as I felt. Lucky for me, this meant we could leave early. I do admire how he can go through with it despite the dislike, but I don’t like his wolf’s clothes.
I don’t think he would need me at all if he took them off.
- The red sylvari.. what was his name again? Is a liar and a good dancer it seems. Kormir bless him, if he can lie about a simple thing such a dancing, who knows what other lies are surrounding him?
The female he was with was the prettiest flower I have ever seen.
prefers loves is attracted tolikes men.
- I am not sure how to feel about this. He
likes teasingteased me. Promised to stop. Failed.
- Men shouldn’t—. But he said that two women—. I had no idea—. How do they even—?
City people are very different from what I’m used to.